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Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Episode 12: Sex Questions and Answers

 Sex Questions and Answers
By Christie LaValley for Under the Covers on
***This is in no way is an ad for sex.  These are suggestions for your personal life, not for office visits.

Q: Is there anything you can do to change or increase your sex drive?
A: Experts say the answer lies not so much in what your sex drive is, but whether or not it has reached its potential. The level of desire is individual, but can also differ with each partner, and vary within a relationship, increasing or decreasing over periods of time.
Age is also a factor in sex drive, amongst men and women, and is usually due to a decline in sex hormones. Furthermore, there are a number of emotional and physical conditions, as well as medications like some anti-depressants, that can affect desire.
Physical problem can cause sex drive to decrease such as erection difficulties in men, or painful intercourse in women. However, after treatment is received normal levels desire usually increase. If emotions or chakra blockages are getting in the way, talking to a counselor or sex therapist or Reiki practitioner  can help. And sometimes, sex drive will recharge on its own, as your life changes.Maybe you just have not met the right partner yet.

Q: Are you ever “too old” to make love?
A: As long as both you and your partner are in good physical health, experts say both men and women can continue to have sex to any age. However, sex can become difficult due to the affects of aging and medical conditions that become more prevalent as we age.
Even if intercourse is not possible, remember that physical intimacy can take many forms, and that sometimes getting older really does mean getting wiser about the many ways in which partners can bring each other pleasure. 

Q: Can too much masturbation hurt your sex life?
A: As long as masturbation isn’t your whole sex life, and does not take precedence over intimate relationships with a partner, masturbate all you want. You do need to take into consideration how your partner feels about you masturbation habits and consider does this upset your partner?  Also important to consider: How much of your time do masturbation activities occupy and does it keep you from other things in your life, including having sex with a partner? If so, it can be problematic in many respects.  Masturbation should be pleasurable PART of your sex life. 
Masturbation is a great way for couples unable to have regular sex to be intimate and can be a nice change

Q: What is the definition of “sex addiction” -- and what does it entail?
A:   According to “Sexual addiction is best described as a progressive intimacy disorder characterized by compulsive sexual thoughts and acts. Like all addictions, its negative impact on the addict and on family members increases as the disorder progresses. Over time, the addict usually has to intensify the addictive behavior to achieve the same results.
For some sex addicts, behavior does not progress beyond compulsive masturbation or the extensive use of pornography or phone or computer sex services. For others, addiction can involve illegal activities such as exhibitionism, voyeurism, obscene phone calls, child molestation or rape.
Sex addicts do not necessarily become sex offenders. Moreover, not all sex offenders are sex addicts. Roughly 55 percent of convicted sex offenders can be considered sex addicts.”
Behaviors associated with sex addiction include: Compulsive masturbation; multiple extramarital affairs; anonymous sex partners or strings of one night stands;  consistent use of pornography; consistent need for phone or computer sex; continuous use of prostitutes; sexual exhibitionism (such as “flashing”); voyeurism (watching others have sex); stalking a sex partner. 

Q: Do aphrodisiacs really work? If so, which ones have the best track record? 
A: Since early ancient time,  various foods, plants, scents, drugs, and devices have been thought to have mystical powers of stimulating sexual desired.. Among the most legendary are oysters (they do contain lots of sperm-friendly zinc) and green M&M's, which has no basis in reality! The use of Spanish fly or cantharides which is made from dried beetle remains. It is works because It irritates the urogenital tract, causing the sex organs to become engorged with blood. Spanish fly is a poison that is also known to burn the mouth and throat, cause urinary infections and scarring, and sometimes death.
 According to Cosmopolitan, studies at Chicago's Smell and Taste Research Foundation found the smell of black licorice and doughnuts increased penile blood flow by 32%, while lavender and pumpkin pie boosted response to 40%. In women, vaginal blood flow was increased by smelling a combination of cucumbers and candy, while the smell of cherries, barbecue meat, and men’s colognes caused a decrease. Some researchers however, debate the integrity of these findings.
In animal studies a substance known as yohimbine, obtained from the bark of an African tree, had results that the FDA has called "promising." But the FDA maintains there is no conclusive evidence that this, or any aphrodisiac, works on people.

Q:  What causes erectile dysfunction? 
A:  According to there are many causes of erectile dysfunction. 
“Sometimes it's caused by a health condition. Other times, lifestyle plays a role. But blood flow is always important. If blood is prevented from properly flowing to the penis, it can lead to erectile dysfunction.
Sometimes, ED can be caused by a medical condition. Many conditions including diabetes, high cholesterol, and hardening of the arteries can affect blood flow in the body. And this can lead to ED. Also, depression can lead to ED.
Other times, it's caused by medications. Some medicines that men take for conditions like high blood pressure and depression can lead to ED.
Lifestyle factors can also play a part. For example, smoking can damage blood vessels. And it can lead to hardening of the arteries. This may prevent blood flow to the penis and can cause ED.”
Vaigra seems to have addressed these issues and one little blue pill could help.  In the east and in tantric beliefs it is thought that erectile dysfunction can be improved by having sex with the same woman for 10 days with her on top.  You should not worry about any outcome but to enjoy the woman trying to please you.  You are to just lay there and enjoy with no worries about your penis’ behavior.

Q: What is the average penis size?
A: A study conducted by Lifestyles Condom Co. shows that the average length of a male sex organ is 5.877 inches. Other reports, however, indicate that the average length of a penis is between 5.9 to 6.2 inches. Most of these reports don't have a large enough sample size to be statistically significant. Therefore, you can expect that the average penis size is between 5.8 and 6.2 inches.

 Rest assured that you really only need an average size penis to please the vagina. According to “The internal walls of the vagina itself do not have a great supply of nerve endings, thus are not very sensitive to touch. The outer one-third of the vagina, especially near the opening, contains nearly 90 percent of the vaginal nerve endings and therefore is much more sensitive to touch than the inner two-thirds of the vaginal barrel.”

Q: What is the most common cause of sex issue between couples
While they can take many forms, sex problems are defined as any physical or emotional issue that prevents a couple from achieving a mutually satisfying intimate relationship.

The most common for men include prostate problems, a decrease in the blood supply to the penis, nerve damage to the spinal cord, or a decrease in the hormone testosterone. In women common problems include a lack of desire caused by a decrease in the hormone estrogen, thyroid disorders and pain during intercourse caused by any number of vaginal problems, including a lack of lubrication.
Some couples also find that the use of certain drugs can also cause sexual problems. These include alcohol, nicotine, narcotics, stimulants, some blood pressure drugs, antihistamines, and certain antidepressant medications.

Q: What is the most common sexual condition affecting men?

A: Studies show it is premature ejaculation, which can affect up to 75% of men. Clinically it is defined as the release of the ejaculate from the penis either before intercourse can take place, or quickly after it starts, usually within less than 15 "thrusts." Almost every man will experience premature ejaculation at least once in their life,  however ,for some the problem will become chronic. A highly sensitive and easily stimulated nervous system, obsessive compulsive disorder, or sometimes a lack of control over the body's response to excitement are usually the roots of the problem.  The use of certain medications including some cold pills and stress can cause temporary problems.
Treatments for chronic premature ejaculation include the antidepressant medication clomipramine (Anafranil) taken 12 hours before sex, and use of a condom to help reduce sensation. Sometimes a prescription lidocaine cream can also help by reducing sensation, but that can also impact the partner.

Q: What causes sexual dysfunction in women?

A: Unlike their male counterparts  who require certain physiological events to have intercourse, women have no such restrictions. The most common reasons for sexual dysfunction with women  are often based in matters of desire, sexual arousal, or sometimes painful intercourse. Some women also report an inability to have an orgasm or experience pain when achieving one.
While a decrease in desire can be caused by many things, including a negative relationship with a partner, or other life stresses, physical causes are often traced to a decrease in the hormones estrogen and testosterone that occur during menopause. Not only can this decrease desire, it can also cause a decrease in vaginal lubrication making it more difficult for the sex organs to become stimulated and most likely causing intercourse to be painful.  Also, certain illnesses, such as a thyroid disorder or depression, can greatly impact a woman's desire. Theunfortunate  inability to achieve orgasm is seldom caused by a physical problem, but more often the result of inadequate stimulation by a woman's partner. Women often need lots of foreplay and enticing behavior prior to sexual intercourse.
Q: I'm horny when I have my period. Is it cool to have sex, or will I totally gross my guy out?

A: There is only one way to be sure how your man feels, ask him. If he's is willing, it is best to stick to man-on-top mode. Bleeding is often e lighter if you're lying down,"
While there are benefits to doing the deed during your time of the month like a heightened libido and reduced cramping, it is still very possible to get pregnant. Use of a condom is suggested since both partners are more apt to contract HIV at this time.

Q: My boyfriend ignores my nipples, I hate it.  I think turns me on just as much as playing with my clitoris. Does it?

 A: According to an article on,” psychologists at Rutgers University in the U.S. found that when women's nipples are stimulated the sensation travels to the same part of the brain as when their genitals are aroused. Brain scans of women who made themselves aroused showed that the nipples hit the same spot as the vagina and clitoris.

The research confirms for the first time what many women have experienced themselves - that their nipples can be an erogenous zone too.  The researchers asked 11 non-pregnant women between 23 and 56 to stimulate themselves while they lay inside a brain scanner.

The resulting images show the areas of the brain which were affected were like a 'cluster of grapes' in the medial paracentral lobule, which is in the middle and at the top of the brain.”  Which by the way is directly correlated to the crown chakra.


***This is in no way is an ad for sex.  These are suggestions for your personal life, not for office visits.  

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